Wrestling Boxing Personals Profile for imperator

Competition with other guys lets us wrestle with our own manhood :)
imperator
imperator
username sex age sexual seeking
imperator Male 41 Gay Friends
Talk about a profile desperately in need of revision. So here's an update. I've never been in a real honest to goodness fight (unless you count one time in grade 10, but it's barely worth mentioning, let alone going into details) and that's not really what I'm looking for. I'm interested in 'wrestling' with another guy as sort of a metaphor, to explore wrestling with myself. On the one hand, I'm a guy raised in a culture that basically empowers men, that propagates chauvinism, sexism, homophobia, dominance at the tip of the almighty, all-penetrating cock, and I know some of that programming 'sunk in.' I can be a bully sometimes, I can be domineering and arrogant and egotistical, a part of me is conditioned to control everything I can and to respond with rage at everything else. I can be a Dick. Other hand, I'm a gay guy with some submissive tendencies, some schooling in buddhist meditation with a mind towards overcoming ego, a liberal inclination that chafes at authoritarianism and patriarchy and privilege-- even my own male privilege. When I'm thinking about it, I'm a feminist and an egalitarian and a radical queer (militant, even, where the 'maleness' creeps back in). And those two parts-- the Dick part and the anti-Dick (or Dick-less, ha ha) part-- they clash. Part of me really wants to externalize that conflict and play it out with another guy in the flesh, to 'throw down with my Dick' and see what comes up, in me, in him, even in an audience if anyone's interested in watching. So my interest in wrestling is to see what my ego does when the spotlight is on it-- when another guy, 'my Dick,' is trying to dominate me, humiliate me, control me, expose me, reduce me, penetrate me, make me his 'bitch,' and I'm trying to resist all of that Dick-ishness on behalf of every 'other' part of me-- the gay, intellectual, liberal spankee part-- that still wants to express strength and pride without being a Dick, and wants to 'subdue' Dick without succumbing to it. I think it would be interesting as hell, psychologically, and could end up being really hot, t'boot. What I imagine in an ideal partner for this? A guy (obviously); ideally athletic, or at least fitter than I am. Virility would sell the 'him as my exaggerated maleness' theme. I'm inclined towards my age or younger, where youth is stereotypically less thoughtful, and because being dominated by a younger guy (if he 'won') feels like it would be more of an embarrassment, more of a 'shock' to process afterwards. I'm inclined towards a straight or bi guy-- no, not because I hate myself or other gay men, or because I worship straight men, but because the male-privilege I'm compelled to wrestle with is tightly linked to heterosupremacism. Frankly I think a guy with that experience of straight male taking-power-for-granted could not only convincingly 'play' the sexist homophobe I want to fight, but might have some of that in him that's genuine, that could also benefit from a 'shock' if he lost to a 'fag.' Imagine how much more of a shock if the terms were that the loser gets 'loser-fucked,' imagine the struggle you'd get out of a straight guy fighting not to be 'immasculated' by taking it in the ass from a gay guy that overpowered him-- even if it was just the threat of getting sodomized without the execution. Even if the terms of engagement were 'loser gets fucked, unless he says 'you're superior, I surrender, you can do whatever you want to me,'' I'm preoccupied with this question-- would a guy find it easier or harder, to get 'loser-fucked' or to give up (and invite the other guy, out loud, to loser-fuck him). So I think a straight guy would make the experience way more complex and interesting, given the right stakes. A proviso, though: I have a bf, so if I was going to meet someone it would have to include (and be okay with) him. He might be into just watching, or he might want to be involved as soon things got sexual, if they got sexual, and if you aren't cool with that then thanks anyway. No high expectations from joining this site but you never know, right? Give me a shout if you want to know anything more.
Fredericton New Brunswick

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